Friday, November 2, 2012

Don't Open the Window, Unless You Want To Attract Undead Pervs

I like it when movies tell me what to do. Don't Go In the Woods, Don't Look In the Basement, Don't Answer the Phone, because I rarely know what to do. But of all the advice I ever received from movie posters I believe Don't Open the Window is the most useless. Zombies can come in a window, I suppose, but they rarely do. They're dead, they're stiff, and because they're just pure, motorized biological drive they tend to take the path of least resistance. Sure, you can close the window, but I would probably concentrate on the front door first. This movie poster does speak one truth, though, in the motion picture Don't Open the Window, better known as Let Sleeping Corpses Lie and less known also as The Living Dead at the Manchester Morgue, they have tampered with nature and at least a few people will pay the price. 


Could you please open the window, Mabel? No, there's a zombie out there eating someone's entrails. In that case, don't open the window. We'll just stare at the naked chick in the neighbor's window. perhaps this woman's real problem with attracting undesirable type dead pervs is she's standing in the window naked. That should be the title of the movie. Don't Stand In Your Window Naked If You Don't Want Undead Pervs To Gather Outside.























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